I provide counseling services to women struggling with people pleasing and relationship trauma through the lens of childhood trauma using EMDR and parts work.

I am passionate about working with women who find themselves caught in an inner conflict or held back by an inner resistance that keeps them from connecting with their needs and feelings.

Although I have categorized my areas of expertise into four different categories they all overlap.

People pleasing causes an immense amount of stress and can affect our mental health resulting in anxiety and depression.

People pleasing is a coping skill adapted during childhood as a way to feel loved and accepted by our caretakers. It is the result of childhood trauma. 

The unpredictability that you grow up with keeps you in the space of fearing loss of acceptance and love. This can either keep you in a constant state of anxiety or make you believe that you are alone and you have to raise yourself.

These experiences can result in forming anxious or avoidant attachment. These childhood experiences have a big role to play in who we allow into our lives. Being stuck in our old patterns can trigger a sense of helplessness and anxiety about dating and other relationships.

People pleasers who might have an anxious attachment style are more likely to attach to someone who might be an indifferent/avoidant type who keeps a distance and holds back. This type of a relationship increases stress, triggering self doubt resulting in anxiety or depression.

People pleasers who are avoidantly attached are very self reliant, they never ask for help, they prioritize other people without expecting their own needs to be met. They might allow people into their lives who are comfortable with being kept at an arm’s length. These types of relationships might make them feel lonely and disconnected resulting in depression.

The trauma experienced from being in a toxic relationship can leave you feeling symptoms of PTSD which includes anxiety and depression and if you have had childhood trauma then these experiences can reinforce old negative self beliefs, like “I am unlovable”, “ I cannot accept that there is nothing I could have done differently”, “I cannot be myself because no one will accept it”.

Counseling Services